Cartoonists’ Jerk Off Habits Because Bill...

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Cartoonists’ Jerk Off Habits

Because Bill Watterson (Calvin and Hobbes) rarely gives interviews and leaves little clues about his personal life, his jerk off routine is not well documented. However, fans speculate that during the publishing of Calvin and Hobbes, Watterson would jerk off after every comic’s completion, supposedly reaching his own completion while the fax machine was still processing. When he ended Calvin and Hobbes his jerk off habits became reclusive and solitary.

Charles M. Schulz (Peanuts) reportedly never jerked off in his entire life except for once on the day he was married and twice on the day his daughter was born.

Mort Walker (Beetle Bailey) has been a cartoonist for over 50 years and now works on comic strips alongside his three sons Neal, Brian, and Greg Walker. Mort’s work has been praised as being a lighthearted look at the difficult military environment, and its longevity, providing wholesome fun for over half a century. Mort and his sons like to jerk off into an army helmet, light a fire under it, and cook it in a stew.

Whoever the fuck writes Ziggy (Ziggy) probably jerks off a ton. He probably has a deadline at like 5 PM every day, and then he just jerks off until like 4:50 and says, “Fuck, I just jerked off all day!” Then he has to scrap together some shit drawing and a terrible joke. He’s just like, “Fuck that 4 panel shit, I’m just going to do one panel, and my character is going to be a blob.”